But I would not believe it

Do you understand me?

...

Do you think you understand me?

... Before I answer, tell me what has motivated you to pose these questions.

Are your answers dependent on what I have in mind? They shouldn't be.

I disagree on that one. What if a good friend asks you, "Do you think I'm hopeless?"

Not much can be more pathetic than a question like that! You shouldn't mingle with such people.

Well, I tend to think that you are one of them.

That's... an offense, an insult, an act of derision, of insolence, it's a, it's a... I would never, ever say such a thing!

If so, you shouldn't react like that, you know...

I am deeply disappointed that, after all this time, you have not realized that I am a person full of, or rather overflowing with, pride. So much so that it gets in my way.

I answered your two questions, it seems.

You have demonstrated that you do not understand me, but you may still think that you do.

It looks like I have to put it bluntly. I don't think anyone understands you, and I don't think anyone thinks s/he understands you.

I wish what you said were true.

You don't want to be understood?

The brutal fact is that nobody understands anyone, including her/himself, completely.

If we can only incompletely understand each other and if we admit it, why are we here?

To differentiate what we understand from what we do not, and to strive for greater understanding.

Doesn't it mean that we should aim for complete understanding when we know it is unattainable? It sounds useless, pointless, meaningless, futile, unrewarding, stupid...

Without efforts to reach a goal, we will slip further away from that most desirable state. It is true for almost all human conditions: as an individual, the states of body and mind, and as a member of a group/community, the states of interactions and contributions.

After one day of no dancing practice, the effects are noticeable only to the dancer her/himself. After three days, her/his fellow dancers see it, and after a week the audience. Something like that?

Yes, although the ultimate purpose of practicing is to dance perfectly, if s/he does not practice, s/he would not even be able to maintain the imperfect, and yet the highest, level that has been reached.

Isn't it also true that when s/he thinks s/he is perfect, there is no more room for improvement and it is time to retire?

For the professionals in competitive sports, the equivalent would be when they no longer feel the irrepressible urge to win.

Can't we say, then, that we'd better retire from this business named life when we stop thinking about improving ourselves as human beings?

Have you noticed that there are so many of what we could call deadwood around us?

I am concerned that increasingly more people turn into deadwood as we age.

Nothing is more boring, annoying and damaging than people who think they understand when they do not, or they have understood enough when they have not. "Croyez ceux qui cherchent la vérité, doutez de ceux qui la trouvent," you remember?

"Believe the ones who are in search of the truth, and doubt those who find it." André Gide, I think.

One of the biggest problems for me is that I cannot tell them that they do not understand.

Saying so requires the assumption that you understand that they do not understand.

To hint at it is not only against my taste, but also counterproductive. If they are to be convinced of the necessity of further understanding, they need to reach that conclusion by themselves.

I know that you also abhor the arrogance behind the thoughts that s/he understands well.

All of us have moments with that idea, but it is something that should be kept to ourselves. Socrates went further and genuinely believed that he did not know anything.

"I know that I know nothing." That one, right? But doesn't that clash with your dictum that attractive persons are self-confident?

Self-confidence comes in various shades. I'd say many are of false kinds. They make us act self-confidently, chiefly because we are supposed to; they degenerate into aggression, overreaction at the slightest evidence against our worth, and lack of grace. Truly self-confident people do not intimidate others, readily admit their lack of information and mistakes, and all that without letting others and her/himself lose faith in her/him.

When you asked me if I understood you, should I have said that I do not understand you entirely, but I'm trying my best to understand better?

What matters more is actions, and people can act contradictorily to their own words, as we know too well.

You shouldn't take words too lightly, though. What if someone says you are an idiot, but s/he trusts you with tasks that s/he wouldn't to others?

My interpretation would be that almost everyone is an idiot in her/his world and I happen to be the least idiotic.

But you remain hurt and/or offended by being called an idiot.

Not after I am convinced that idiots alone inhabit in her/his world.

What if you are in love with someone, and that person says s/he doesn't understand you?

I value honesty above all.

Really?

Okay, let's say honesty with diplomacy. Anyway, I would be highly suspicious of someone who says everything about me is great.

How so?

Anyone of that opinion has a small brain or a long agenda.

Does it mean that only the weak-minded and the wicked-minded would be in love with you?

We should stay away from discussing romantic relationships for now. That is altogether a different territory where logic breaks down more than often. By the way, you shouldn't confuse "I don't agree with you" and "I don't understand you."

You are right, the second one is much more about the person as a whole. We say the first phrase more often and casually. Isn't it true, though, that the ones who make passes at you look like they would score very low on an IQ test?

I think that is why they make passes at anyone, including me. You may think that any gesture to show interest is a compliment to the target, but I can tell you that it can get very depressing, sometimes repelling.

I remember your getting angry, not depressed.

I want to be left alone sometimes, because people do not understand me, and what is worse is that they do not acknowledge that they do not understand. I have no desire to explain why they do not understand, or why I am not like them, because if I do, I would end up offending them.

We all want others to try to understand us. Otherwise, we would feel that nobody cares about us, or worse, that nobody acknowledges our presence.

I am always ready to give basic respect to everyone. I also demand that in return. As for certain people, I would take it as an insult if they think they understand me.

It's more than the people who make passes at you, I presume.

The curious thing is that if I enjoy, rather than be bothered by, the label, 'weird,' people who masterminded it change their thoughts.

They start thinking that there must be something good about the way you are?

I never intended to make use of psychology for such a purpose, but in effect, I have.

Don't worry, it hasn't worked on me.

"I wish someone could tell me who I am. But I know that I would not believe it." Do you happen to remember who said it?

Hmmm... it doesn't ring a bell. Is it... yours?

I would never pull your leg like that.

I'm trying my best to understand...