I'm not late, am I?
No, you're not. But, it seems like we have settled into this pattern of meeting every other week. I thought it was supposed to be every week.
I would like to make it that often, but things are a bit hectic right now.
Isn't that your excuse when you don't have anything to complain about? It seems like only when you do, you call a meeting to give me an earful.
I am shocked to hear that you think our talks are like that! I thought we were aiming for truly meaningful conversations like Plato's.
You mean, Symposium, the Republic, etc.?
Of course.
Let's say we can't stop anyone from aiming high. Think also about the psychological suffering that your statement may give to the admirers of Plato. Remember when we got comments from random people because of our chat about oxygen masks?
Talking about goals and such, I think role models are important in our lives.
Isn't it interesting that we can take advantage of our innate behavior to ape others?
We unconsciously mimic the ones around us. We also do to others what others did to us, again without any explicit plan to replicate.
That's why many who are molested as children grow up to become child molesters.
In general, any kind of abuse of the younger tends to be passed on from generation to generation. The role models are different from such cases, because we consciously decide that we want to be like them. In other words, you are supplementing your biological urge to imitate with recognition that you want to make use of it, but in a selective manner.
Most people cannot vision an ideal person from the abstract, and thus, are need of more concrete examples?
For most, there is a big gap between understanding in theory and applying that theory to real-life situations.
That includes you, I suppose?
It is true that sometimes I do not have a satisfactory solution as to how to behave in certain situations for a long time. I keep on observing until I encounter a good one. In that sense, the answer is yes. But I also learn from what I don't like about people. In many such cases, I only have to adopt a strategy that is opposite of what I see.
Doesn't it help to be exposed to people from different cultures?
Some cultures handle certain difficult situations so well, whereas other cultures do not; it is better to have contact with as many cultures as possible. The problem is that when I am in Lilliput, I become exasperated by what I see as undesirable behavior and would never be witnessed in Laputa. While I am in Laputa, I get incensed by what I think is undesirable behavior and would never be seen in Lilliput.
It gives you more exposure to both good and bad ways.
People with such background often become some kind of a chameleon as a result.
Did you ever have a role model?
No, I shun anything that has a hint of personal cult. I like copying bits and pieces from all over the place.
It fits your self-description as a chameleon. Do you prefer yourself that way?
Naturally. It comes with a stamp of approval from Blaise Pascal! "Le centre du monde est partout."
I somehow knew that this was all leading to your self-aggrandisement...
More seriously, the thoughts about role models have made me re-evaluate the perennial principle of life that we mentioned very briefly, namely, ask-and-shall-be-given type of teachings and advice. I realize that role models are variant of that, and as I believe in the power of role models, I began to think that ask-and-shall-be-given may have a grain of truth in it.
After all, almost any culture has a proverb to that effect.
Role models are different from the generic ask-and-shall-be-given in that we make use of our biological nature to mimic.
If you now think the ask-and-shall-be-given principle is valid, how do you explain the fact that there are thousands of millions of people who wish to be billionaires, but are not?
Let's say most of us have to start from setting a goal. Wanting to be rich and famous wouldn't make you so overnight, but having that explicit goal may help you keep your antennas tuned for appropriate opportunities. I think it is quite remarkable that we can steer the course of our lives and control what kind of persons we become with our desire as the principal tool.
That would not happen to other animals.
Goal setting is the mechanism that makes our mimicking selective; we do not follow any example, but the examples that we have chosen and approved. I believe that selective mimicking occurs among animals, too, but in a less conscious manner, of course. What differentiates homo sapiens from others is that we do not have to be in direct contact with the person who is our role model.
Any autobiography can be a good substitute for a live role model.
On a slightly different note, I am getting terribly annoyed with people who literally beg for attention. They are the ones who haven't thought about goals.
Some people ask for your attention? They must be quite desperate.
Dropping a stupid line to get a response is just a starter. In some cases, they tell me how much time they have on their hands and how bored they are.
Just a stupid line? You, on the other hand, babble all the time!
Okay, I do, but not to get attention. Complaining how bored you are is exactly what you should avoid to get people's attention. Who would want to spend time with someone who cannot even take care of her/himself? Anyway, my point here is about attraction. It seems that you cannot become an attractive person worthy of attention, unless you aim for it.
In other words, all attractive people actually think that they are attractive?
At least, they think they want to be so and they have thought about how they should go about it. I think the same applies to people who have managed to set themselves apart in various ways. It could be something as simple as dressing well, or as complicated as becoming recognized as a maverick. Or, mastering some skills and techniques. Consciousness is required for all of these.
But that can make people conceited.
I agree. There is a fine line between, for example, people who want to appear as cultivated persons and those who want to be cultivated persons. Being truly cultivated sometimes requires us to want to appear cultivated.
Now tell me, have you ever tried to set yourself above the hoi polloi in any of your bizzard ways?
The funny thing is that if you start thinking that you yourself is attractive, you can convince some people that you are, and that without becoming truly attractive.
I'm surprised that you think I've got such charisma.
It was a generic 'you'!
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