I had been wondering why I remembered short, distinct periods of time much better than the longer ones.
You mean the intensity of your memory is negatively related to the length of time spent for a specific activity?
Yes, if the activity in question is quite different from what happened before or after.
Jumping rope every morning for a quarter of an hour does not qualify as something of short duration and special, I presume.
If we live in the Land of Marbles, and someone from the Land of Jumping Ropes comes over to perform for the first time in history, yes.
Come to think of it, we seem to remember short flings better than the long ones.
We tend to equate the density of our memory to the intensity of the affair, but that is not quite true. Simply owing to the fact that it did not last long, we tend to remember the smallest details, not necessarily because we were so much in love with the person.
That explains the claims of people who have had a succession of lovers.
They say that they were very much in love with every one of them, and I have come to understand that they are not exaggerating. The same applies to more generic interactions.
A talk about life with a person who happens to sit next to you at a bar, for example.
I am certain that what s/he said would have a bigger impact than the same said by some other person you have known for a long time and meet regularly.
Suppose you are told that you are a coward. Wouldn't that have a bigger effect if it is from someone who knows you quite well?
That's true... But only the first time around.
Well, here is another piece of evidence against durability of long-term relationships.
I'm afraid you are right. Your spouse may say exactly what your short-fling lover says, but their potency to you is far from being the same.
So, you are now convinced that the reason why you remember two years here and three years there better than other longer periods is not because they were inherently special?
I have discovered that it is because they were quite different from the periods that sandwiched them. I still go back to my childhood years that I spent in the Land of Giants and Witches.
It must have been a scary place.
After we left that Land, my parents started telling me that I shouldn't laugh like a witch or a sorcerer. They never said anything to that effect when we lived in the Land of Giants and Witches.
Why do you think they changed their attitude?
I had picked up the way of laughing while in the Land of Giants and Witches, and I guess it appeared inevitable to my parents. Now that we were in the Land of Headless Phantoms, they realized that my laughs do not conform to the local culture which happened to be my parents'. Anyway, it had always puzzled me why I could recall so much about my stay in the Land of Giants and Witches as well as about the assimilation period in the Land of Headless Phantoms that followed.
That's because they were of short duration?
Not only that, but also because both were so different from the times that proceeded and followed each of them.
It looks like you now know how to answer when someone says, 'You're attributing that to your having lived in the Land of Giants and Witches? But that was only for two years.'
I always forget to tell them that my siblings and I lived without my parents and with a family of Giants and Witches for a while. It seemed like a year at that time, but it must have been 3 months or so... In any case, I should point out that it is because of the brevity that it has had lasting effects on me.
You were also at a tender age.
Right, neither twisted nor hardened yet. But I can say the same with other short segments, later in my life. I remember the 2-year periods better than the over-5-year ones, and I know that the shorter ones were no more eventful than the longer. Only in my memory, they turn out to be so.
Your 6-year stint in the Land of Mean Bean-Counters, for example, was riddled with hardships.
And yet, everything from that period has become so blurry in my mind.
What about the slightly longer sojourn in the Land of Evil Priests and Ethicists?
As much as I had been appalled by their double, triple, quadruple, quintuple, sextuple...
Comrade, you have sufficiently demonstrated your vocabulary.
Although their multiple standards repelled me, I am certain that as time passes, I would not remember every instance of their flagrant breach of own ethics. Or how they imposed authority by intimidation, how they divided in order to conquer, how they forgot and recalled as they saw fit, how they lost and regained hearing faculty at the strangest moments, etc.
Perhaps you should take notes before it is too late.
Doing so would reinforce my anger.
All right, it's better not to waste any emotion because of them...
Besides the increased capability in storing information, going to a different Land turns mundane chores---such as doing laundry and taking public transportation---into something special, because we are not used to the local ways. Ordinary days become full of discoveries.
Of difficulties, too.
True, but we do get exposed to what we did not know before. That in itself is life enriching, unless it is something so traumatic that it could destroy you.
Can you say that traveling is one way of living more intensely?
You mean the intensity of your memory is negatively related to the length of time spent for a specific activity?
Yes, if the activity in question is quite different from what happened before or after.
Jumping rope every morning for a quarter of an hour does not qualify as something of short duration and special, I presume.
If we live in the Land of Marbles, and someone from the Land of Jumping Ropes comes over to perform for the first time in history, yes.
Come to think of it, we seem to remember short flings better than the long ones.
We tend to equate the density of our memory to the intensity of the affair, but that is not quite true. Simply owing to the fact that it did not last long, we tend to remember the smallest details, not necessarily because we were so much in love with the person.
That explains the claims of people who have had a succession of lovers.
They say that they were very much in love with every one of them, and I have come to understand that they are not exaggerating. The same applies to more generic interactions.
A talk about life with a person who happens to sit next to you at a bar, for example.
I am certain that what s/he said would have a bigger impact than the same said by some other person you have known for a long time and meet regularly.
Suppose you are told that you are a coward. Wouldn't that have a bigger effect if it is from someone who knows you quite well?
That's true... But only the first time around.
Well, here is another piece of evidence against durability of long-term relationships.
I'm afraid you are right. Your spouse may say exactly what your short-fling lover says, but their potency to you is far from being the same.
So, you are now convinced that the reason why you remember two years here and three years there better than other longer periods is not because they were inherently special?
I have discovered that it is because they were quite different from the periods that sandwiched them. I still go back to my childhood years that I spent in the Land of Giants and Witches.
It must have been a scary place.
After we left that Land, my parents started telling me that I shouldn't laugh like a witch or a sorcerer. They never said anything to that effect when we lived in the Land of Giants and Witches.
Why do you think they changed their attitude?
I had picked up the way of laughing while in the Land of Giants and Witches, and I guess it appeared inevitable to my parents. Now that we were in the Land of Headless Phantoms, they realized that my laughs do not conform to the local culture which happened to be my parents'. Anyway, it had always puzzled me why I could recall so much about my stay in the Land of Giants and Witches as well as about the assimilation period in the Land of Headless Phantoms that followed.
That's because they were of short duration?
Not only that, but also because both were so different from the times that proceeded and followed each of them.
It looks like you now know how to answer when someone says, 'You're attributing that to your having lived in the Land of Giants and Witches? But that was only for two years.'
I always forget to tell them that my siblings and I lived without my parents and with a family of Giants and Witches for a while. It seemed like a year at that time, but it must have been 3 months or so... In any case, I should point out that it is because of the brevity that it has had lasting effects on me.
You were also at a tender age.
Right, neither twisted nor hardened yet. But I can say the same with other short segments, later in my life. I remember the 2-year periods better than the over-5-year ones, and I know that the shorter ones were no more eventful than the longer. Only in my memory, they turn out to be so.
Your 6-year stint in the Land of Mean Bean-Counters, for example, was riddled with hardships.
And yet, everything from that period has become so blurry in my mind.
What about the slightly longer sojourn in the Land of Evil Priests and Ethicists?
As much as I had been appalled by their double, triple, quadruple, quintuple, sextuple...
Comrade, you have sufficiently demonstrated your vocabulary.
Although their multiple standards repelled me, I am certain that as time passes, I would not remember every instance of their flagrant breach of own ethics. Or how they imposed authority by intimidation, how they divided in order to conquer, how they forgot and recalled as they saw fit, how they lost and regained hearing faculty at the strangest moments, etc.
Perhaps you should take notes before it is too late.
Doing so would reinforce my anger.
All right, it's better not to waste any emotion because of them...
Besides the increased capability in storing information, going to a different Land turns mundane chores---such as doing laundry and taking public transportation---into something special, because we are not used to the local ways. Ordinary days become full of discoveries.
Of difficulties, too.
True, but we do get exposed to what we did not know before. That in itself is life enriching, unless it is something so traumatic that it could destroy you.
Can you say that traveling is one way of living more intensely?
I certainly think so, and that is one of the biggest reasons why it is so addictive. Some time ago, I asserted that travel enables us to forget reality for the time being. As far as I can tell, that poses no contradiction to the view that we live more intensely through traveling.
What about relocating?
Ditto. The two---travel and relocation---have different advantages, though. On one hand, lack of modern trappings may appear romantic to a short-term traveler and plain annoyance to long-term residents. On the other hand, if we want to get to know the local culture better, we have to stay longer.
Ditto. The two---travel and relocation---have different advantages, though. On one hand, lack of modern trappings may appear romantic to a short-term traveler and plain annoyance to long-term residents. On the other hand, if we want to get to know the local culture better, we have to stay longer.
Some extract the maximum from their lives, not by traveling or relocating, but by pursuing one short-term affair after another...
Who can blame them if every relationship opens up a new world, as any good relationship would?
Who can blame them if every relationship opens up a new world, as any good relationship would?
... Comrade, something tells me that you do not fully endorse your own assessment. You agree, though, that serial daters and globetrotters have something in common.
Sure, both try their best to stretch their life-time, or more precisely, their preception of time.
There is nothing wrong with it, right?
You must also know that people tend to be nicer at the beginning and at the end.
So, more beginnings and ends there are, the better?
Just don't believe what they say at welcoming and good-bye parties, or during the first few dates...
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