Sorry, I wasn't quite prepared for another meeting in less than two weeks. I know that we used to meet weekly, but it has been every other week for over half a year now.
Would you be making the same excuse if the appointment were not with me, but with Barack?
Are you saying that I should have been here an hour before our agreed meeting time?
My question is: why are you casual about being late to see me, but probably would not be so if it were Barack?
Well, he has other important engagements and I don't know if I would be able to have a meeting with him again very soon.
I, too, have other activities that are mighty important.
I didn't know that you were going to attend the meeting with senior advisers at the White House.
How do you know that my activities are less important? Plus, this may be the last time that we meet.
You didn't tell me that we were going to terminate our project without reaching our goal!
I asked you to come over today, because the café will be closed for a month or so for miscellaneous repair works. The owner informed me a couple of days ago.
I take it that you do not wish to carry on at other venues in the meantime.
Where else can you find mandazi, halva, cendol, and hot chocolate made from chocolate and not cocoa powder, all on the same menu?
I tried hard to be on time today, though.
I think you would have tried harder if it were Hugo.
All right, I admit that it depends on the temper and the character of the person whom I am to see. I know that you wouldn't start accusing me of bourgeois habits and so on.
You are another victim of the intimidation-and-fear equation.
It's natural! Wouldn't you take more precautions if Sonja, Graça, or Angela were waiting instead of me?
No, I will make sure to be on time whether it is Lula or you.
Why wouldn't you be more careful with them?
We are all human beings---nothing more, nothing less. That fact alone says we should be on time.
Regardless of the official title, political and financial power, you mean.
Of course. If any of them makes difference in observing punctuality, you are classifying human beings into several categories and that based on how much damage they can do to you. As I pointed out, it's intimidation and fear.
Just as you wouldn't pat Al on his shoulder for a good job, you wouldn't be a nano second late to our meeting. Is this it? I suspect you are one of those who would ensure not to wear kid-gloves when dealing with people in power. You wish not to be affected by any privilege that you happen to lack.
Bravo, comrade! You have a pretty good grip of my thoughts.
But suppose Sonja is your sister. You wouldn't mind being a bit late, would you?
I would. We should not abuse a relationship, just because it is one that we are obliged to keep: in this case, siblings.
True, we tend to be more careful with friends than with family members.
That is exactly what I call abuse of relationships.
We are more careful with lovers, but less so, once they become spouses.
It happens because the relationship is transformed from one that can be easily terminated to another that cannot.
Isn't there a honeymoon period for any relationship, though? When you are in the process of getting to know each other, you tend to be more considerate.
When we face someone whom we favorably view, but whose details are unknown to us, we exercise caution with the hope to establish a good relationship with that person. It can happen with something not so organic, such as a new city that we move into or a new position that we take on.
Lack of familiarity also means that we do not know the unpleasant aspects.
That is why a honeymoon period is possible with anything that we deal with; something new and different can bring us excitement, and some of the pitfalls are not evident at first sight.
Sadly enough, enthusiasm almost invariably wanes over time, even if we do not find anything grossly wrong with it.
That is indeed a sad fact of life.
I have heard of couples who met when they were 18 or so, immediately fell in love, and carried on with the same intensity for the rest of their lives.
Such anomalies aside, we tend to lose respect and care that we had at the initial stages of getting to know someone or something.
Some people cast all respect aside once they find out that I am not going to, or cannot, do any harm to them.
If you do not make them fear you, they would make you fear them. "I put for the general inclination of all mankind, a perpetual and restless desire of power after power, that ceaseth only in death."
Thomas Hobbes!
People whom I trust without reservation are those who pay sufficient respect to all others in a constant and steady manner. The other side of the coin is that I do not trust people who are unnaturally nice to me at the beginning of relationships. Life would not be so bad, if it were easy to come across trustworthy people.
Is the temporary closing of this café also meant to be a sort of time-out for me?
Why do you think so?
I remember your telling me about the cough-cough, wink-wink, nudge-nudge strategy. Since then, you have been going back to it quite often. It has made me paranoid, even terrified. I think your favorite tactic belongs to what you have been condemning, namely, intimidation and fear. And my feeling is that Thomas would agree with me...
Posts
